Just had the opportunity to see the new Jessica Simpson video for "These Boots Are Made For Walking". Just about what I expected. But there are some glaring things that that I feel the need to mention (well, snark is more like it.) I know I'm nitpicking, but I also know that I'm not the targeted demographic for this video. Those who are probably won't be reading the rest of this post anyway. They're probably on their third viewing already and (edited because this is a family-friendly blog aggregated on an even more family-friendly website.)
- I grew up watching "The Dukes of Hazzard", just like pretty much every southern kid in the '80s. And the one thing that you know even if you've only watched 1-2 eps is that you don't open the doors of the General Lee. The boys always shoved themselves out of the windows. When I asked my former race-car driving daddy why, he said it was because it's a race car and they weld the doors shut (if that's wrong, please don't flame me - I actually went looking online and no fansite I could find had an answer to verify.) So what the hell is Jessica doing opening the car door in the first scene? To me, not only does that completely screw the authenticity of the movie (since I now assume everyone will open the car doors) but it ruined their chance to get another big ol' picture of her butt. Since her butt was actually the star of the video, they missed a golden opportunity there. They could've gotten a shot of the boots elsewhere.
- When did Jessica become pre-Federline Britney Spears? Never thought of her as a great singer or performer, but I at least gave her credit for wearing clothes. I know she's Daisy Duke, but dayum. And as a southern woman, I'd have to say that I've never seen any other southern women washing cars while wearing string bikinis (well, with the exception of the women advertising the naked car wash at Christie's Cabaret on 8th Avenue) especially when they're washing the car indoors. If Jessica had worn her Daisy Duke outfit for that, she not only would've been more authentic, she could've had great wet T-shirt potential for the guys. But I digress.
- Why did they feel the need to bill this song as a duet with Jessica and Willie Nelson? Because, frankly, you can't even really hear him in the song. If they hadn't used him in a couple of shots (okay, the one of him breaking a beer bottle over a guy's head was funny) and had her give him props onstage, you'd never know he was involved. It's a sad world when a legend gets upstaged by an butt.
- When you're dancing around a bar, giving guys lapdances with their beers for free, you probably shouldn't sock a guy in the head for getting fresh. Just sayin'.
- Please don't tell me this song is getting its own line dance. Scratch that. Please don't tell me that this song is going into heavy rotation on country radio and CMT.
- Did the producers of this video come up with the "washing the General Lee" idea before the Paris Hilton Carl's Jr. ad? I do prefer Jessica's car-washing skills to Paris'. I assume they cut a suggestive water-spraying shot somewhere so that they'd actually get on CMT. But in any case, if Jessica's career somehow gets shot to hell, she can always get a job at the Christie's Cabaret car wash.
In any case, it's an amusing video, but it doesn't give me a whole lotta hope for the movie. The main nice thing that I can say is that I'm forever thankful that Jessica didn't give Burt Reynolds a lapdance in it.
And in other non-Dukey news, American Idol winner Carrie Underwood is playing Fan Fair, and played the Opry last night. Not only is she about five-times a better singer than J.Simp, she keeps her clothes on. Go see her, y'all.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment